ESRB Re-Rates Splatoon Raiders to "Mature" Due to Gamers' Thirst For Shiver

Is Shiver making the Gamers ink their pants? (Source)

Citing a massive and unexpected spike in Gamer simping, the Entertainment Software Rating Board (ESRB) made an emergency move re-rate Splatoon Raiders from E10+ to M late yesterday evening. "We haven't seen a level of worship for this Shiver character since Zelda's butt in Breath of the Wild and Ridley's tongue in Metroid Prime," said an ESRB representative we interviewed at 2am because both parties were too busy spending the day rummaging through the internet for Shiver fan art to ogle over. "After we received reports of teenagers with Splatoon apparel getting too - uh - "close for comfort" to the octopi at several aquariums, we had absolutely no choice but to raise the rating for [Splatoon] Raiders." Splatoon Raiders released last month to much fanfare as the series known for intense battles, whacky bosses, and "a huge amount of gayness, like an incredibly absurd amount of gayness" turned to a single player focus for the Switch 2. Shiver supports the player character ("The Mechanic") in Splatoon Raiders with developing gadget parts, piloting the game's drilling robot, and abusing her seductive attitude to convince the Mechanic to grind a bottomless cavern for her treasure. This is the first time the ESRB changed the rating of a game since Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas in 2004, when the game's rating was moved from M to A after pressure from right-wing political groups when it was discovered you could play as a black character.