Japan to Begin Taxing Foreigners Living Abroad

Any comparisons between her excellency and the Cart Titan will not be tolerated!

Tokyo, Japan – Seeking both new tax revenues and to "preserve Japanese cultur,"Japanese Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi announced earlier today plans to start taxing all foreigners, including those not currently visiting or living in Japan. “The tax proposals laid out previously should do a great job at suffocating tourism and harming residents living here in Japan,” claimed Takaichi to a room of reporters, “But there are over 7 billion foreigners overseas that we could be taxing as well. It would be a huge misstep to ignore our potential to harm them as well.” Takaichi went on to specify that soon Japan would be rolling out taxes affecting all foreigners including a global sales tax, global property tax, and a global tax for acknowledging Japan’s atrocities during World War II. Early studies suggest nearly all people across the globe disagree with being taxed by Japan despite neither living or visiting the country, but those same studies have found approximately 50% of the non-Japanese “weeaboo” population supported the tax with individuals on social media stating that they were happy to “become poorer in order to bring glory back to Japan” and that “being treated poorly by Japan makes me feel like I’m living out my dream to be a true Japanese worker.